Twelve years ago today, I made one of the best decisions of my life… I married my husband. Like any other marriage, we have had our ups and downs, but we are here today, standing together, stronger and more in love, than on the day we said “I do”.
There are many, many reasons I love my husband. To name a few, he is the most amazing father. He loves to hang out and spend time with our children. He is calm and patient, gentle and kind. He finds ways to show me he loves me. But there is one thing that has really stood out to me over the last 18 months…
He is my strength and my constant support.
On the day of my brother’s memorial, I wanted to speak. I remember standing there, in front of about 1,000 people, and the words just wouldn’t come. I had made the mistake of starting my tribute with his name, David. And I couldn’t say his name. I remember standing there, trying time and again to get words to come out of my mouth. I remember I couldn’t stop shaking. I remember feeling like I was going to collapse under my own weight. I remember feeling like this was all just a bad dream… And then I remember seeing my husband stand up from where he was sitting and walk up onto the stage.
My husband gave me such a gift that day. He could have remained sitting and allowed me to flounder. He could have led me off the stage. He could have taken my paper and read the words that I so desperately needed to say. But he didn’t do any of those things.
He held me up.
He quietly came behind me, wrapped his arms around me, and held me up. He held me up so that I could speak and tell all of the people there that day about my incredibly caring brother and how he would have wanted us all to find our joy. He knew that I needed to speak.
That is my husband; my constant. my comforter. my strength.
I don’t know where I would be today without him. God knew, twelve years ago, what was going to happen in my life. And he knew that Joey was the one He could use to help me through the pain and the heartbreak.
Since my brother’s death, my husband has taken on a job that he didn’t ask for, a roll of comforter to a degree that I am certain he never imagined. During those hard months after David, he made countless dinners, took over with the kids, slept with the light fully on, and held me in the wee hours of the morning when all I could do was sob.
He has been here for me and held tight to me in my “for worse”. And for that, I am forever grateful.
“The proof that you love someone is not that you have warm affectionate feelings toward them. The proof is in your actions, your words and your sacrifice, your willingness to give the best of yourself and your willingness to get nothing in return.” (Katherine Walden)
I am so thankful for this man. For his gift of time, his gift of strength, his gift of comfort. I’m so thankful that he held tight.
I’m so thankful that I walked down the aisle to him twelve years ago today. And that I get to call him mine…
I can truly say, “I have found the one whom my soul loves…” Song of Solomon 3:4
Hold on tight today to the one you love…